COMPLAINT DEPARTMENT,AND I DEMAND
SATISFACTION!

I HATE BEING A BITCH ON CHRISTMAS,
BUT ONCE AGAIN I DIDN'T GET WHAT I WANTED.
GOT DAMN IT! I WAS A GOOD GIRL THIS YEAR.

I KISSED MORE ASS THAN HILLARY DID IN THE
PRIMARY. I TOLD PEOPLE THEY WERE LOOKING
GOOD WHEN THEY LOOKED LIKE DEATH WARMED OVER.

I TOLD STUPID PEOPLE THAT THEY WEREN'T STUPID
THEY JUST NEEDED TO GO BACK TO SCHOOL.

I TOLD MOTHERS THAT THEIR BABIES WERE CUTE,
WHEN INSIDE I WAS THINKING WHO DID YOU F##k
TO CREATE THAT!

I EVEN EMAILED WHOOPIE GOLDBERG THAT I THOUGHT
SHE WAS A VERY BEAUTIFUL WOMAN.

I EMAILED GEORGE BUSH AND TOLD HIM THAT I THOUGHT
HE WAS THE GREATEST PRESIDENT OF ALL TIME.

I STOPPED USING THE WORD STUPID IN FRONT OF
MY NIECES KIDS. SHE HAS TAUGHT THEM THAT IT'S
A BAD WORD.
EVEN THOUGH I DON'T AGREE, IT'S NOT A BAD WORD
IT'S JUST NOT A NICE WORD...AND IF YOU CALL SOMEBODY
STUPID YOU MIGHT GET YOUR ASS KICKED. IT'S NOT
A BAD WORD, HELL YOU HAVE A LOT OF STUPID
PEOPLE AND TO NOT RECOGNIZE THAT, WELL YOU'RE
LIVING IN A MAKE BELIEVE WORLD.

I'VE HEARD SPONGEBOB AND JUDGE MATHIS USE
THE WORD STUPID...NOW WHAT CHERYL?
BOY OH BOY I BETTER NOT USE MY FAVORITE
CURSE WORDS,LIKE F##K YOU ,YOU MOTHER F##KIN
SHIT HEAD SON OF A BITCH DICK HEAD.

I HAVE A FEELING IF I TALKED THAT WAY IN
FRONT OF AARON & KEVIN,I WOULD END UP CALLING 911,
BECAUSE SHE WOULD HAVE A HEART ATTACK. THEY'RE
5&6 THEY KNOW CURSE WORDS EVEN NEW ONES THAT
I DON'T KNOW...WTF?

YES SIR REE BOB, I'VE BEEN GOOD THIS YEAR.
I GUESS IT'S ASKING TOO MUCH FOR PEOPLE
WHO LOVE ME AND ADORE ME ENOUGH
TO CHIP IN TO BUY ME A MANSION.
ALL YOU PEOPLE DO IS JUST THINK ABOUT YOURSELVES.

TO MY RICH SISTER IN SOUTH CAROLINA...GROWING UP
YOU OWE ME MONEY FOR ALL THAT BABYSITTING,
I LOVE 'EM BUT YOUR KIDS ARE THE REASON I NEVER
HAD KIDS.

TO MY 3RD OR 5TH COUSIN MARIAH YEA THAT ONE!
YOU OWE ME BECAUSE MY MOTHER BABYSITTED
YOUR FATHER. PLUS I WROTE A SONG CALLED
"HEARTBREAKER" YEARS BEFORE YOU WROTE YOURS.
YOU STOLE IT...YOU HAD A "VISION OF LOVE" MY ASS!

I'VE BENT OVER BACKWARDS,AS FAR
AS THIS FAMILY IS CONCERNED,
AND THAT POSITION HAS
ALWAYS GOTTEN ME IN TROUBLE,WHEN WILL
I LEARN?:(

AS OF NOW YOU'RE ALL OUT OF MY WILL,I'M LEAVING
MY JAR OF QUARTERS & MY OBAMA COLLECTION &
MY ALBUMS TO SOMEONE WHO WILL
APPRECIATE THEM.
KARL THE WINO WHO LIVES IN BACK OF THE
LIQUOR STORE...I'M ALL ABOUT GIVING SOMEONE
THE GLAMOROUS LIFE...YOU ROCK SHEILA E.!

I'LL DO OKAY ,I HAVE IT FROM A SOURCE THAT
I WILL WIN THE LOTTERY SOON...AND THIS SOURCE
PREDICTED THAT OBAMA WOULD WIN, SO IT'S VERY
RELIABLE.IT'S A COUSIN OF A FRIENDS
NEPHEW WHO WAS ONCE MARRIED TO A THIRD
COUSINS AUNTIE WHO WAS RELATED TO ABRAHAMS
BROTHER.IT'S TOTALLY BIBLICAL.:)

AFTER I WIN YOU PEOPLE WILL NOT BE
ABLE TO CONTACT ME, FOR SOME REASON RICH PEOPLE
BECOME INACCESSIBLE.CONVIENTLY MAYBE,
BUT NEVER THE LESS, IT WON'T BE ANY DIFFERENT
WITH ME... BUT KEEP TRYING,YOU MIGHT GET LUCKY,
JENNY MIGHT HAVE MY NUMBER BUT I THINK THAT
NUMBER IS DISCONNECTED.

YOU CAN TRY IT FOR YOURSELF, AS I REMEMBER, IT WAS
867-5309...:)