DYSFUNCTIONAL FAMILIES & FRIENDS...

MY NIECE AND I WENT GROCERY SHOPPING
YESTERDAY, THERE WAS A GUY LOOKING FOR
DONATIONS FOR DYSFUNCTIONAL FAMILIES.

I SAID I UNDERSTAND ,WE COME FROM DYSFUNCTIONAL
FAMILIES OURSELVES. HE SAID I LOVE YOUR SENSE OF
HUMOUR...I WAS BEING SERIOUS.:)

IN MY FAMILY EVERYONE'S PROBLEMS ARE MORE
IMPORTANT THAN YOURS.
I COULD TELL MY SISTER THAT I HAD TO HAVE BOTH
OF MY LEGS AMPUTATED TODAY.

HER REPLY: THAT'S NOTHING UPS BROKE A FEW PIECES
OF MY LlANDRO COLLECTION...AND MY POOL BOY IS
IN THE HOSPITAL.

I CAN TELL MY MOM I HAVE CANCER AND HAVE 6 MONTHS
TO LIVE.

HER REPLY: WELL I HAVE DIABETES AND I CAN'T EAT CANDY,
TRY LIVING WITHOUT SWEETS,YOU ARE SO WEAK...WTF?

I COULD TELL A FRIEND THAT I'VE BEEN ARRESTED
FOR A D.U.I.,CAN YOU HELP ME?

THEIR REPLY: I TOLD YOU IN HIGH SCHOOL STOP
DRINKING AND DRIVING ...PLUS I NEVER LIKED YOU,
YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE BETTER THAN US
BECAUSE YOU WERE THE FIRST TO GET A CAR.
GO TO HELL YOU SNOOTY BITCH.

YEA I SHOULD HAVE DROPPED YOU BITCHES OFF
IN HOLLYWOOD THAT NIGHT,WHERE YOU ALL WOULD HAVE
BECOME WHORES...NOT THAT YOU DIDN'T ANYWAY...

YEA L, I WAS DRUNK YOU BIT ME IN THE BACK AND TOOK THE
KEYS MAYBE YOU SAVED MY LIFE,MAYBE YOU DIDN'T.
I THOUGHT I HAD RABIES IT WAS LIKE I WAS BITTEN
BY A MOOSE ,THAT HURT FOR YEARS.

MY MINISTER: FATHER I HAVE SINNED...
HIS REPLY: YOU TELLING ME! I'M SURPRISED
YOU'RE NOT BURNING IN HELL THIS VERY MOMENT.
YOU'RE LIKE A LITTLE SIN MACHINE...
WHY DO PEOPLE HAVE TO JUDGE PEOPLE,
WHERE'S THE LOVE?